The world is a twisted place. I’m fortunate to have my head on straight. Real shit. The toughest battles I have are not with others but with myself. I battle with the fact that so many people have their priorities all messed up, and it’s not up to me to set them straight. It’s hard to sit back and just watch the mess unfold. Why are those who are undeserving given what they desire. While the good continue on doing what they do best and wait patiently for what they deserve. Can’t rush a good thing, I guess. Only fools rush in.

Some people think that they don’t ever have enough time. Time is all we have. You either work with it or it works against you.

Love is and has always been personal. It’s defined by the individuals In the relationship. It is unspoken but it is still felt. Love is an honor.

Marriage is a title. It’s sacred, nonetheless. So why is the marriage success rate 50%? Is it because we rush into divorce as quickly as we rush into marriage? Marriage isn’t meant for the fickle and weak of heart. Dont misconstrue marriage for love. Love doesn’t deserve that kind of disrespect and dishonor.

So do me a favor, if you’re ever fortunate enough to fall in love… Savor it, relish in every second and every moment because there are people who yearn for it so badly and have found it in all the wrong places. And another thing, marriage is another level of commitment and a job in itself. Who do you know has worked at anything for a lifetime or an eternity?

I guess I’m just done crying. I’m done trying. Today I think I’ve officially lost the person who’s supposed to be my best friend. It’s a harsh realization… To figure out that the person you thought meant for you doesn’t fit perfectly into your world like a puzzle piece. Just as I am not a perfect fit in his world. It scares me to say that this is the end of the road. But my heart tells me that Its taken enough of a beating.

I’m trouble.  Do you remember me? and me?

trouble always looks so good.  it looks good enough to lure you in.  that’s just it.  it’s all looks.  smoke and mirrors.  trouble makes you perceive what it wants you to see.  

maybe, if I close my eyes, y’all will disappear.  I doubt that because y’all have yet to leave. 

So i was asked if i ever finished my book.  to be honest, i don’t remember the characters names.  I don’t know if I could ever finish it.  At times, I wanted to finish it.  Be done with it.  Other times, there’s just no perfect ending.  Every book deserves a happy ending.  Just like the movies, the underdog always prevails.  It’s my book.  I’m the writer, and if I want to improvise or create fiction then it is to my discretion.  Who doesn’t want to see Michelle find her prince charming?  Nearly 4 years later, and she’s had all kinds of apples.  bad apples.  shiny apples.  green apples.  rotten apples.  bitter apples.  over ripened apples.  Or is she completely content filling her appetite knowing that none could ever suffice? 

or has she found THEE apple of her eye?  

Surely, she hasn’t spent the last 4 years without some juicy apples!

she reminds me so much of myself.  she yearns to learn her lessons the hard way.  the way she wants everyone to understand her complicated situation.  but every time she shares her story, it’s as though no one understands.  no one understands her love.  no one comprehends her magnetism to negative energy at times.  positive plus negative creates an attraction, right? does she see the beauty that we all see? The intensity of her love and drive deserves to be reciprocated.  Reciprocation is to be felt by action, not only heard by word of mouth.  Prove yourself worthy of a love so intense that she’ll feel no need to question, fight or defend it.    

“cause girl i don’t PLAY hard to get. I AM hard to get.” 

I’m selfish. Nothing personal.

i am currently taking a film class.  I’m not a film major.  I am not even interested in films.  I seldom watch movies myself.  However I am interested in getting at least 12 units a semester, hence a dumb ass film 372 class.  I am not sure if the people who are enrolled in this class are film majors, because they’re egos are driving me up the wall.  We are supposed to remake one movie we watch.  Tell me why some talkative-i love my voice- control every detail- mole face broad can’t be there for filming day is intent on filming The Conversation (boring) over Return to Oz because she’s never seen it.  Looks like tough shit ugly moled girl.  Yes, you volunteered to write the script.  But so did I.  Is it our fault that you can’t be there? No.  Is it our fault that you haven’t seen it? No.  You have had 2 days to watch it.  You’re so hell bent on doing the script… work with the group.  Team player bitch.  I haven’t seen a group that was so difficult to work with.  

Whatever the case is, since she stole my role as a scriptwriter and some dumb fat bitch pushed me out of the spot… watch me take the lead role (be it man or woman), and change the fucking script as i please. ;)  

and NO, i won’t cover for your ass mole faced fuck.  I will not report to the teacher that you were present at filming day so that you get a good grade. you’re only looking out for yourself.  are you looking out for the rest of your group?

“Integrity is not a conditional word. It doesn’t blow in the wind or change with the weather. It is your inner image of yourself, and if you look in there and see a man who won’t cheat, then you know he never will.”